8 Things Acohol-Free Women Do Before 8 AM
I’ve been alcohol free now for 266 months. Many of my friends don’t drink alcohol, either.
What I choose to do right after waking up sets the mood and attitude for my day. If I am in the mood of gratitude, it won’t even occur to me to dash off a hostile text. If I set an intention to practice tolerance today, I’ll be curious about how I will deal with my impatience when I’m in an endless line at the self checkout at Target. If my intention is to write and publish a blog post before noon every day, I somehow find the time and energy to do so. (See this post as Exhibit A.)
Being alcohol free is far easier when I set myself up for success by doing the following 8 things before 8am.
- Write down 5 things you are grateful for.
And write them with a pen on paper. Buy yourself a pretty journal or notebook that pleases you when you touch it.
Handwriting solidifies a thought or an idea in a way that typing simply doesn’t. If you want your gratitude to land, write it out.
This morning, I am grateful for the quiet I experienced as I walked the dog. I’m grateful for my lungs that allow me to breathe fresh air and move. For the cleaning crew. And the chia pudding I made yesterday. And for my bright red oversized reading glasses. ;)
Gratitude opens our hearts and grounds us in what IS. It puts in the middle of abundance and grace. And what a beautiful way to walk through your day.
2. Read something spiritual or inspirational
This morning I read Emmet Fox’s meditation from the book Around the Year with Emmet Fox. I am not particularly religious and yet his teaching lands with me. Today’s lesson was about being connected with Source rather than looking to the outside for validation.
I awakened with a loud voice of self-doubt. This meditation helped me reorient by shifting my attention.
And when those doubting thoughts show up, I remember to redirect my attention.
3. Move your body
Sweating outside is about my favorite thing in the whole world. I don’t care if I’m swimming, skiing or hiking.
Drinking alcohol releases a “feel good” hormone into our systems, setting us up to want that feeling more and more.
Exercise-released endorphins also feel good. And when our physiology feels good, there isn’t room for that negative self-talk to sneak in.
4. Connect with another alcohol-free woman. And ask her about herself rather than talking about yourself.
Our behavior and our biology adapts to match our social environment. If we hang out with people who drink a lot, staying alcohol free is gonna be a ton harder, if not impossible.
Your biology wants you to fit within your environment. And it will change the genes that turn on and off to match with the people you’re with.
Simply being friendless is unsustainable. It’s easier to let go of drinking buddies when you are cultivating relationships with other alcohol free sisters.
5. Sit quietly for at least 30 seconds, watching our breathing.
The first glass of wine was so seductive to me because I was exhausted from the swirl of my thoughts that ran nonstop.
My thoughts were a wild horse running amok down the beach.
When I simply count my exhales up to 10 and then return to one, again and again, I start to be able to watch my thoughts rather than getting caught in them.
Can you try this right now? Simply breathe for 30 seconds. And see if you can disengage from your thinking and simply watch the thought machine spin.
6. Set an intention for a spiritual principle to practice today.
If I stay the same as I was when I drank, I am going to drink. If I continue to behave the way I did as a drinking women and simply remove the drinking, I am going to pick up a drink again. Maybe not today. But it is inevitable.
I need to substitute something for the alcohol.
Dostoevsky wrote that if I tell you NOT to think about a polar bear, you won’t be able to keep from thinking about a polar bear.
If I tell you to not drink, it’s inevitable that what you will think about is drinking.
I pick one spiritual principle to practice each week. This week’s principle is observing rather than reacting.
This gives me something new and positive to focus my attention on. Rather than focusing on the absence of alcohol.
Other spiritual principles that might appeal to you include:
- Patience
- Amusement
- Kindness
- Tolerance
- Honesty
- Willingness to take new actions
- Concern for others
- Humility
- Trust
Which will you practice this week?
7. Write about your experiences yesterday, the lessons you learned and how to apply them to today.
As my therapist, Joan, said, “You paid the price in pain for your ticket admitting you to the learning. Might as well learn the lesson.”
I’m not convinced that everything happens for a reason. I believe that everything happens, and we get to choose whether or not we learn and change from the experience or not.
Unfortunately, the lessons keep getting louder and bigger until we do capitulate and learn and change.
So what bugged you yesterday? Write it out. Imagine if you could rewind the tape what you would have done differently. Visualize how you could have practiced this week’s spiritual principle in that situation.
Then write out what you will do differently in the future.
8. We make a 100% commitment to not drink today.
Making a 100% commitment is easier than making a 96% commitment.
Why?
Decision fatigue.
We make 35,000 decisions. Every. Single. Day.
From what kind of milk to put into our coffee to which sweatshirt to put on.
It’s freaking exhausted.
If you make a 100% commitment to being alcohol free today and declare that your status today is AF, you will act in accordance with that decision no matter what or who shows up.
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If you identify with my story, congratulations! You probably have a drinking problem. Experiment with being AF for a week. Sign up for my FREE 7-Day Stop the Spiral Challenge.
